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The real reason you don’t claim your thing (and how you can)

I’ve known how I wanted to make an impact on the world for awhile now.

I’m talking many, many years.

But it’s taken me until now, this blog, this new website, to really commit to doing it, rather than just thinking about it as something that will happen in the future.

 

And perhaps your story is not much different.

 

You know there is something more, something bigger that you are meant to be doing. That you want to be doing.

But you don’t do it. Or you play at it, occasionally, rather than turn your full attention to it.

 

Maybe it’s the case that you kinda know what you’re here to do, but it’s still hazy, or perhaps you definitely know but the idea of it scares the crap out of you so you find plenty of ways to avoid it (yup, that’d be me).

If you relate to this, I want you to know that it is perfectly normal.

Following your purpose is a challenging path – if it wasn’t we would all be doing what we love already!

But keep reading as I’ve got a few ideas that can make your journey a little easier.

 

IT STARTS WITH CURIOSITY

 

All my life, I’ve been fascinated by why people do the things they do.

It’s been like my personal obsession. I started out by being curious about my own and other people’s deeper motivations for what they said and did, which grew into a desire to figure out ways to do things differently if my words and actions didn’t serve my highest good or those around me.

Over the years, friends, family and colleagues have asked for my help if they wanted a new way of looking at a challenging situation. After I trained as a life coach, I took that skill to a whole new level and used it professionally as well. Helping people see things in a new, more empowering way, so that they can act from a place of self-love and empathy, is my jam 🙂

So my “thing” is helping people see the higher ground, the path that honours everyone involved.

And  I LOVE helping people in this way.

 

CLAIMING YOUR THING TAKES COURAGE

 

Reading what I’ve written so far, you may be thinking that I’ve definitely claimed my thing.

Well kinda. I’m on the cusp. And it’s freaking me out.

So far I’ve said it out loud to a (supportive) friend. I’ve made steps to launch this real me to the world (with this blog).

But as I write this post, my first for Insider Tips to Everyday Joy, my guts are roiling. I feel slightly sick at the prospect of people reading this, in the real world.

Why?

Because one of you may not support my self-revelation. You may not applaud my courage. You may not appreciate my deep desire to be of service; my willingness to stand in my truth.

Instead, for whatever reason, you might decide I’m full of it and I need to be taken down a peg; I’m talking bollocks and I need to be told so; or that I’m wrong and you’re going to tell me what’s right. (All blog topics to come by the way!)

The greatest obstacle to me claiming my thing has been my fear of visibility.

Putting my head above the parapet and becoming a target.

But what other people say only has an impact if we allow it to, which means those people aren’t the real obstacle.

The real fear is that what they are saying is true and confirms what I’ve been thinking for years.

 

Who am I to do this thing?

Am I good enough to do this thing?

What qualifications do I really have to do this thing?

 

Sound familiar?

So how do we deal with the real fear – that we’re not enough somehow to do this thing?

 

IT’S TIME TO FLIP THE SCRIPT

 

For me, the journey to that point where I knew I was enough was gradual. I didn’t wake up one day and feel invincible, it was more like I woke up one day and my belief in myself had tipped over the edge. So my “I am enough” was finally strong enough to elbow out my “I’m not enough”.

My self-doubts still crop up (a lot), but that core belief is now a feeling inside of me and it acts like a touchstone. When I get an attack of the wobbles I find that feeling, I sit with it for the briefest of moments, and it gives me the strength of purpose to keep moving in the direction of my dreams.

So here are a few things that have helped me get to that point:

 

  • 1/ Allow yourself to be where you are. Sometimes I have felt so impatient about getting somewhere and so pissed with myself for not “being” there already that I got stuck in a whirlpool of self-criticism. But once I allowed myself to be where I was, I could be present again, which meant I could actually see the way forward!

 

  • 2/ Follow the breadcrumbs. If you’re not where you want to be yet, or not even sure where that is, it’s OK. There is a unique journey each of us has to follow, and the next step is ALWAYS right in front of you. And when you’ve taken that step, the next one will become clear. You don’t need to know exactly where you’re headed, you just need to keep your eyes peeled for the next step.

 

  • 3/ Find your touchstone. The strength of my inner knowing that I was on the right track is what finally gave me the courage to commit to sharing my knowledge on this blog. It came from spending lots of time using and developing my unique talent, which gave me the inner confidence that it really is my thing, that I really am good at it, and it really does help people. (My doubts and fears haven’t disappeared, they’re just not as strong as my commitment to making this happen.)

 

  • 4/ When you’re ready, take action. Eventually I reached a point where I couldn’t not doing anything any longer. It was a subtle shift, a decision I made on the inside. “Enough,” I said, “it’s time to start moving forward.” The simple difference from then on was that I took small, consistent steps toward putting my “thing” out into the world.

 

  • 5/ Finally, trust. Even if you can’t see the path, take a step and trust your feet will land on firm ground. More often than not we’re all flying blind, but if you trust there is something guiding you in the right direction, you can face the unknown with a sense of adventure.

Over to you

I’d love to hear which of the steps above resonates with you most, or if you have a different strategy that has helped you to claim your gifts. Please share it in the comments below.

If you got something out of this post and know someone else who might like it too – please share. Send it out on social media or forward it to a friend or colleague.

Here’s to you claiming your thing.

Big hugs,

Lynn x

PS. This is the very first blog on Insider Tips to Everyday Joy and I’d love to hear what you think, so drop me a line at hello@lynnhord.com with your thoughts or any topics you’d love me to tackle in the future.

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